Tuesday, July 12, 2011

What is Fear?

Where does fear fit into our life?

I was out walking this morning and I had an “Ah-Ha” moment about fear.

Fear is nothing more than a limiting emotion that is evoked in us after a tragedy, an embarrassment, a mistake, or something unknown. What is the purpose of fear? Well we know it exists in the animal kingdom to warn of danger; an instinct innate in the animal kingdom for survival. What about mankind? Why do we need fear? Okay so let’s just get past the idea that we need fear to keep us safe from falling off the edge of a cliff or keep us from entering into a lion’s den. I get that fear, what I am talking about is our limiting fear? The fear that creeps up in our throats when we have to get up and talk, call somebody we don’t know, or confront a problem. It’s the fear that stops us from following our dreams. This fear is ruled by our Ego. Yeah, that’s right, EGO…We all know the creepy voice in our heads that replays all the failures of others and convinces us that we will do the same. The same creep that says we aren’t worth it. It’s too hard…we’re not educated enough… we’re too fat, thin, short, tall etc. It is that creep which keeps poisoning our thoughts with limitations, lack, failure, and at last fear!

It is our fear that keeps us from trying something new.

What if we knew the secret of overcoming fear? What if we used the tools within us to overcome our fears, doubts and negative beliefs? Just think of the difference we could make in our lives…We hold the power within us to let fear paralyze us or set us free. All we need to understand is where it is coming from.

What if we looked at fear as nothing more than the chunk of bubble gum that clung to our shoe when we walked through the parking lot of the grocery store? Hum, well that takes its power away doesn’t it? Now it is more irritating than paralyzing isn’t it?

Let me give an example… You all know I am about to release my first novel. Within the process of getting it to print, I’ve suddenly come to the realization that the world is going to see into my soul. Suddenly, I am going to be put out there and judged. My creative expression is going to be loved and hated by people from all over the world. Now the paralyzing fear is that people are going to look at my novel and rip it to shreds. The WHAT IFS start to play in the front of my mind… What if they don’t like it… expectations are too high… too much details between the characters… it looks like a child wrote it...so on and so forth.

Suddenly my fear has captured my dream and held it hostage, and it doesn’t feel too good. I tell you, most of the time it is a lot easier to throw our hands up and say, what the hell, you caught me! Yeah, I was trying to sneak my dream past you. The fear of failure is big, heavy, and strong when we let it squat in our minds. But it doesn’t have to be that way. We can battle back and all it takes is LOVE.

All we need is love for what we are doing, love for the experiences and people in our lives, love for ourselves. Love will conquer any fear. Love will kick fear’s ass to the curb and let us dance along to fulfilling our dreams. Self love is major. So often we’ve allowed other people’s limits to become our own. Well so and so wasn’t able to do it, so I won’t.

Who’s to say we can’t or we won’t? We must love ourselves before anyone else can.

We have to know within our core that we are worthy. We are worthy of our dreams! Did you hear that? Here let me yell it…WE ARE WORHTY OF OUR DREAMS. Our dreams are what make us unique. It is what makes us individuals. They are the one thing nobody can take from us. We mustn’t let fear get its gnarly hands on our dreams. We must see everything from love, unconditional love. Come from love, go with love in our hearts, and suddenly we will see our dreams begin to materialize in our lives.

It doesn’t mean we have to become friends with people we don’t get along with, or go out and rescue every person in need. Coming from love means we don’t have to give our power away anymore. We can stop worrying about all the wrongs in our lives and start celebrating all the rights! Stop focusing on the what ifs and know the truth. Start seeing the good in every situation, every person, and in all the space around us. Stand outside and let the sunbeams warm our faces, watch the birds soar, listen to the trees swaying in the wind, and rest in gratitude for every moment we have to live our dreams.

And if the WHAT IFS start to take over our thoughts, remember… we hold the power to cast out fear and welcome the endless supply of unconditional love. It is time to celebrate the greatness within us. Who knows we might just find that we are not alone in making our dreams come true!

Thanks for sticking around and reading my ramblings!

 Me seeing my book for the first time in print!


  1. I read the book by Susan Jeffers, "Feel the Fear and do it anyway". Actually I read it twice. It was SO inspiring to me! One thing she said which has stuck with me forever was, "If you believed that you could handle anything that came your way, what would you have to fear? The answer is "nothing". Our fear is that we will not be able to handle whatever it is that comes our way. handle it, deal with it, same thing. I have tried to re train myself into believing that I can handle anything that comes my way. Whether good or bad, I can handle it and come out OK. That phrase really helps with the fear of the "unknown" and the "what if's". So.. what if?? So what? I can handle it! Love that saying. I enjoyed reading your blog and totally agree!!

  2. Thanks Nat. Yeah it is all about your mental attitude and how you approach a situation.