For the last couple of years I’ve been changing. Okay, well, I’ve been changing and growing my entire life. But lately, for the last several years I’ve gone through a mental growth period. A Spiritual journey that if I look back, I can see how its unfolded slowly, sometimes painfully, sometimes perfectly, sometimes even prolifically.
In the last couple of months, intentionally or otherwise I’ve really started to embrace the idea of trying to live a selfless life. See, I’ve been wrapped up in the idea that if I produce or do something, I look for what’s in it for me. Normal, or what society has trained me to think. If I do something for someone, what’s in it for me? Whether it comes from that person or someone else, if I give, I’ll be given back to right?
Such a delicate balance/dance with the Universe. We are told give and ye shall receive. You sow what you reap. BUT, what if we aren’t meant to? What if we aren’t designed that way? What if we are designed to sacrifice, surrender, and give without expectations? What if in the act of giving selflessly, without expectations is the key to eternal mana from heaven?
“As you give, so shall you receive.”
What if it isn’t about WHAT you give but HOW you give?
I think about that, ponder that statement for a deeply, personal, real moment and decided it isn’t what I give, but how I give. It’s about my attitude when I give. Am I looking for something in return? Am I giving because I believe the more I give the more I get back? Or, am I in the right state of selflessness when I am giving? Am I doing the act of giving so I will be acknowledged for doing something? Do I post inspirational posts to get the responses that feed my ego or do I give my words to people selflessly? It’s a real dilemma for someone who wants to give without restraint. It’s a real moment of awakening when looking back at my life and evaluate myself honestly, openly, and without judgment.
This isn’t a moment designed to make me feel guilty, or helpless, actually it’s empowering to discover where my true power resides. My real, raw, inner power doesn’t reside in the giving of the “thing”, my real raw power resides in the thought behind it, my intention.
Am I being selfless in what I give? Am I giving without restraint? Giving without conditions? Giving without any forethought of, what’s in it for me? If I can’t honestly answer those questions with a yes, then the actions, the condition, the idea of a selfless, enlightening, freeing moment won’t exist in the action.
It’s the Law of Cause and Effect. My giving, whatever it is, time, talent, treasure is the Cause and what is produced, what happens when I give is the Effect.
“As I give(Cause), so shall I receive(Effect).”
When I give, that is the reward! No matter what. The smile, hug, the thank you, the “things” that return to me are just an added bonus.
I know this seems radical to some. Some people may think, “But G, people will take advantage of you.” Well, to those who believe that I will say this … not really. If I’m not focusing on the effect of my action, but the cause of my giving, those things “added unto me” will be wonderful but not the reason I did the act in the first place. If I am truly pure in my intentions the results can be nothing less than pure. If appearances are on the contrary, then that is in the eye of the beholder and not the one acting out of pure intention.
Listen, I’m far from perfect in this concept. This is what life is for, to practice and keep practicing and when I feel I’ve gotten pretty good at it, continue to practice this concept. Does it mean I say yes to everything? Absolutely not. But when I am inspired to give, inspired to help, asked for something, and I find I’m doing it for nothing more than because I want to, without conditions, and without expectations then I’ll know I’m on the right track.
I strive for freedom from disappointment, from expectations, from pain, hurt, jealousy, suffering, conditions. Living in the moment, being present in a moment, without worrying about 5 minutes, 5 hours, 5 days from now. How empowering would that be?
I must let go of ego. I must let go of outcomes. I must let go of expectations. I must be fully present in the moment with the person, or people I’m with. It’s about striving to live a pinpoint, in the moment type of life. If I trust the Universe to put me where I’m supposed to be, then I need not worry about the future. Every action and reaction, every intention will build, put in place and be made ready for me.
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and rely not on your own wisdom. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct your paths.” Proverbs 3:5-6.
It’s time I started trusting in the power of intention, trust that the Almighty has every answer to every question I could ever possibly ask. It’s time to let go and let God. This Omnipotent Presence will not lead me astray but point me in the right direction to my highest and best good. I don’t have to rely upon my own idea of what I believe should occur. I don’t have to try and figure it out. All I have to do is know, with all that I am, right and perfect action is taking place and the path of my journey will be made easy, straight and with ease.
Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings!