Sometimes You Just Gotta Dig....

The other day I had someone ask me, how can I live without the scars of my past rearing their heads and the bruises of my childhood showing up from my past? How can I ever get over the fear and pain that is etched in every fold of my heart and every curve of my brain?

Sometimes the answers aren’t simple, and sometimes it’s the simplest of moments that can heal a life time of devastation and destruction. Think about it…how can we move forward in our lives if at every door we have ghosts falling out of our closets and at every turn we have past experiences that keep slapping us in the face? I’m not going to tell you that you will fix this over night…I won’t even tell you, you will overcome your trespassers in this life time…but I will try and help you come to realize that overcoming your fear and pain, your anger and guilt isn’t in any way admitting that you are weak, that you are wrong, or that you don’t deserve the best that life has to offer.

I’m also not going to tell you that your pain isn’t real. It’s real and it isn’t something you can brush under the misconception that pretending it doesn’t exist will ever make it go away. We ALL are dealt with blows so devastating in our lives that we either crumble under the pressure or we rise above the pain.  

There are times where the answers are more difficult to hear than the actual act of applying them to your life.

But I will say that when you learn that external experiences are just that…external experiences and that inside you resides a power that created the radiant pull of the moon, the rotation of the planets, and the heart beat that keeps you alive…that is a magnificence you can’t deny. There is a power greater than you and you have the ability to use it. As a matter of fact…you were born with the capacity to use it and it's right where you are!

We have the ability to think. We have the ability to contemplate and make decisions. We have the power to take an idea and form it into something that will either catapult the human race forward or annihilate an entire country. We have the ability to choose and in that ability is where our power lies. Our true power lies in our capacity to make choices. Sounds simple, elementary, even easy to do…but when you learn that volition is something everyone has, it’s a game changer. A huge game changer!

It is at the point of realization where we must decide if we are going to be a victim to our past or a creator of our future. Now I know what you are thinking…come on Gretchen are you really gonna tell me, with a straight face, that we have the power to create our future? YES. I am going to tell you that and I will even go as far as to tell you that the minute you give up the stories of yesterday your tomorrow changes immediately. We can’t move forward in our lives if we keep hanging onto our past. We must let go of the rope that keeps us tangled in the past and reach for the ladder which supports us into our future. Let go of what we can’t change, let go of what keeps us bound in limitation and learn to accept the limitless treasures residing within.

The easiest way to start is forgiveness. We must forgive in order to move forward in our life. We must learn to let go of the pain that clings to our memories of what other people did to mark our souls. I’m not asking you to forget…but I am saying you must let go of the pain that has weaved itself into every fiber of your being, one moment at a time.

I think you need to be told you are brilliant, you need to be reminded you are Love, and that you are a perfect expression of Peace. You need to learn about the unlimited power that lives in your soul. You need to know that the most powerful way to reclaim who you are is by changing your thinking. In the Bible it says, “It is done unto you as you believe.” Read that again…IT IS DONE UNTO YOU AS YOU BELIEVE.

If it is done unto you as you believe, then that means what you believe…right now…is what your life is going to be.

What do you believe about yourself and others? Do you believe you are brilliant? Do you believe you are a perfect expression of life? Do you believe you deserve to be successful, brilliant, and happy? Or are you falling back on the same excuses that kept you exactly where you’ve been stuck?

Anyone can blame others for their plight in life. Don’t be anyone! Look at your past for what it is…A learning experience that helped you grow into the individual you are today. Say goodbye to the empty shells of experiences that you have outgrown and enter into the countless possibilities waiting for you to explore. Stop playing victim; we have enough people filling that role. It isn’t virtuous, it isn’t giving you the power to change your life…All it’s doing is keeping you shackled to your past beliefs and limiting definitions. Be the change you want to see in the world…heck, just by reading this you have taken the first step! Pull out a journal; write down one thing you are grateful for then the next day try and find two things…eventually, you will be able to put the journal aside because your consciousness will create the habit of finding the pearls in your life even among the muddiest of clams. Start finding the pearls in every life experience you have…they are there, sometimes you just gotta dig. Believe me!

Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings.

Yesterday Was A Super Sad, No Good, Very Bad Day

As is sit here and write this blog post I can honestly say, yesterday was one of the hardest days I’ve had in a long time. See, yesterday, Sunday November 10th, 2013 my spiritual center closed its doors. We made a decision, and yesterday…it was over. Rummaging through the sentimental and packing up an era wasn’t the easiest thing to do…

But you see, amidst the change, a new idea was born. I came to realize, the place I worship, the place I find the “church” in my life…isn’t a brick building or a space that is filled with the aroma of coffee or the comfort of a padded chair…my Spiritual Center is within me. My glorious moments of enlightenment aren’t founded or birthed in realities outside of myself; they are discovered one thought at a time, one action at a time in the creative power that lies in every fiber of my being. Sure, I will miss the routine of making Sunday morning more than a day to sleep in. I’ll miss the opportunity to feed my children their spiritual food prepared by someone other than me. But, I won’t stop visiting the spiritual center that resides within me. It won’t stop me from continuing to remind my children, friends and family the creative power that resides in their souls.

Spirituality is more to me than planting my ass in a chair on Sunday morning. It is more than finding comfort in the rituals I so amicably claimed as my own. Spirituality is beyond any form of religion or governmental definition. My spirituality is what governs my ability to understand and practice my religion. IT is what moves me to write this blog. IT is the Creative Process that is born and reborn, renewed and rejuvenated in every cell of my being every moment of every day. IT is what powers my thoughts and creates the miracles in my life daily. Today I will say, “It is done unto you as you believe” and truly mean it. I will wipe the sand of disappointment off my feet and walk forward with a renewed commitment to give unto others as I would give unto myself.

Today is the day I look into the eyes of the people around me and tell them they are loved. They are powerful beyond any limiting definition, and that Freedom, Love, Joy, Peace, and Abundance is theirs for the taking! Today, I look into my future with a new found excitement.

Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings….

I truly appreciate you!

Gretchen

Why Won't They Listen?

So even when I think I’ve heard it all…something tends to come up and bite me right in the ass; yep…teeth marks and everything. It caused me to pause and question just what in the hell have I been trying to do all my life?

Simply put…

Why can’t people just be what I want them to be? Why can’t they just fall into the role I see them as? I mean I do it all the time with the characters in my head. And for the most part…my characters will listen. I mold and shape their personalities or at least I think I do, I tell them what to wear, how to talk, what they are going to do. Hell, I even tell them when they can pee, eat, have sex, and sleep. So, then, why can’t breathing, living, individual people do what I tell them to do, when I tell them to do it? Can’t they see I know what’s best for everyone? (yeah right!)

First, let me just say shoulding on people sucks…for you and them. But I’ll be damned if life doesn’t make shoulding on people super easy. It is so effortless to do. What? You have no idea what I’m talking about? Come on, you should know, it’s the act of telling them what they should or shouldn’t do. “Hey, So & So, you should do this,” and “you should do that.” Our lives make it soooo easy to cast the first stone doesn’t it? But I heard something this weekend that made me straighten up, listen, and begin to re-evaluate my habit of shoulding people.

“YOU CAN’T MAKE PEOPLE BECOME SOMEONE THEY AREN’T.”

WHAT????....SERIOUSLY???  

Yeah, seriously.

Let me say it this way…You can’t make someone into something that suits you. You can’t define what you think that person can or can’t be…because it isn’t your job. It isn’t your birthright to try and mold people into what you want them to be. They have their own perceptions, their own aspirations, and their own ideals of what makes them who they are. Your birthright is to be the best, most loving, authentic person you can be, while discovering all the wonders life has to offer you. It’s about changing your own idea about yourself and how you take shape in your experience of life.

There is nothing noble about taking someone who might not understand where their power lies and try and mold them into something you want them to be. Life is a journey. It’s as individual as the skin and bones that house your soul. Taking on someone’s responsibility of how they should act and how they should behave is only setting you up for disappointment, believe me…because they will NEVER live up to the expectations you’ve set for them. And on the flip side, they might not conform to the limited definition you labeled them with either. So why do we continue to do it? Why are we hurt when they don’t become what we want them to? I’ll tell you why (of course right?)…because it isn’t your responsibility to define who they are and what they should be doing. Do you hear me? Let me say that again…It isn’t your responsibility to save or change anyone.

OH…YEAH…BUT…but nothing. It isn’t your job, responsibility, or right to project your definition of who they should be on anyone…ever. Who gave you the right? Certainly not any Divine Intelligence that I am aware of. I know we all have such good intentions but sometimes those good intentions end up smacking the people we love right between the eyes.

If you truly want to know…your responsibility is to be the best person you know how to be. Be the encouraging friend, supportive partner, caring parent, compassionate relative and loving human being you were placed on this earth to be. We all are born to shine; we are all here to experience the creative urge of life.

What goes around comes around in this world... “It is done unto you as you believe.” So now the question is…what do you believe? Do you believe you are a mighty moving force in this world? Or are you willing to sacrifice your happiness to the judgments of others? 

Don’t let fear dictate how you experience your life. You are born in love, made out of love and are animate from love with every breath you take. You wouldn’t long for something better if you weren’t meant to have it! You wouldn’t ache for peace and harmony in your life if it wasn’t something which already existed in your DNA. You can't see love, but you know it exists. You can’t physically hold a thought in your hands, but you know it’s there. We exist in a material world governed by invisible laws. Laws we use every day and yet never comprehend their true power. Let’s face it…you reap what you sow! So what are you planting in the garden of your life?

Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings.

Love,

Gretchen

 

Love Your Enemies? Yeah Right...

If you can forgive the people you love for their transgressions, then why not your enemies? If you can see beyond the mistakes of people who affect your life, why not forgive those who don’t? See them in their best light, pray for their highest and best good and let them go. If the people who you claim are your enemies aren’t interacting with you on a daily basis, then why are you giving them room in your head?

If you let go of the past, and move into what today is bringing you, all that wasted energy and all that thought which has been tied up in hurt, anger, frustration, guilt and pain…will simply vanish. As easy as it came, so shall it go. But it’s our ego, our need to hold on to the past that feeds the need to keep grading our hearts across the sharp edges of discontent. If you keep judging people according to their past, then where does that leave us in the future, or today?

Mistakes are made; moments are splayed across the memories of the righteous ones. All who are too willing and ready to ignite the spark to their enemies fodder and watch them burn. But what if you decided to drop the match? What if, for that millisecond before you so selfishly put the match to your enemy’s transgressions, you simply blew it out? What if you lay down your weapon and took up your enemy’s cause?

We all want to be loved, listened to, understood, and valued. We all want to start the day born new, unshackled from our past mistakes and wrong doings. Today, be the person who sees beyond the judgmental moments carried on by the conditioned thinkers. Be the person you want the world to celebrate, honor, and love. Be the one who forgives people who have done you wrong. I’m not saying you have to forget or not learn from the pain, but just like a wound that eventually heals and doesn’t hurt anymore, so will be the past misbehavior of your enemies. Eventually you will stop seeing the wound for the pain, but for the lesson that it gave you. Gandhi says, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” I say…recognize the change you already are. Wake up and become conscious of the person you already are and live from that space in your intentions. Live from that untouched space where everything is made new. Where the crooked is made straight and the wicked is forgiven.

I want to leave you with one of the most powerful quotes that still bring me to tears when I read it.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.” Marianne Williamson Return to Love.

So my dear friends, what choice are you going to make today…are you going to continue to shrink in the shadows of discontent, or are you going to grow in the light of self discovery and love. The choice is yours…make it count!

Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings….

Love,
Gretchen

Wha' You Lookin' at?

If you could take a weekend and look at everything that means anything to you…what do you think you’d find? Do you think you’d learn who you truly are? Would you listen to that inner doubting voice that tells you to let the world dictate your experience? Or would you try and find your peace? Would you let other people define who you are? Or would you discover for yourself? If I could tell you the answer to these questions…people would be lining up in droves, throwing Benjamins my way, while waiting for some magical answer to the problems that keep plaguing all of our lives.

I am a writer, and in being a writer; I thoughtfully and methodically pour over words for months, even years sculpturing fantasies for my readers. I pray for the slight chance that I’ve created a world that they can’t wait to escape into. However; making readers fall in love with characters that only exist in my head produces a very delicate vulnerability within me.

I’ll be the first to admit, as I let the hammer of insecurity slam against the thin bones of my self-doubt, I can feel them begin to shatter in the moments of real desperation as I dance on the thin line of who I think I should be and who I truly am.

When did I, as a writer, decide to pander to the dispassionate and unbelievers? Was it the instant I decided to believe in a reality that exists only outside of myself? 

I totally get it….I totally understand you wanna get yours, just as I wanna get mine. But if getting mine inhibits you from getting yours; would the empty trophies of triumph I collect really be worth it? Or would the sting of words, not meant to be uttered, taint the well of harmony within the writing community I so dearly love?

If I’d only take a splinter of time to recognize the grandeur of moments shared between a smile and a look…even the words I’ve shared across a table…maybe, just maybe my life would be different. Is it fair of me to take the life changing moment from someone simply because they don’t understand what I do? Is it inconsequential to share that sacred place within me as I peel back the scars from words so thoughtlessly thrown against my thin skin? Maybe.

But what if…just what if, I took all those moments of weakness, and the vulnerable split second decisions that thunder so violently through my thoughts and shift the burden of misunderstanding to the weight of having faith in something greater?

It isn’t the thoughts that sail in and out of my intellect that power my experience, it’s the ones that decided to set up neighborhoods in my mind that begin to take hold and shape my life.

I think it is time to become aware of my thinking, because what I think becomes what I experience (no matter what). So maybe it’s time to check out what neighborhoods I keep building and rebuilding in my mind.

Thanks for hanging out and reading my ramblings! 

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